how to stay sane during this never-ending lockdown

Yes, it’s been on for a long time.

Yes, it keeps getting extended.

But if you’re in an extremely red zone like me, you’d be thanking your stars things aren’t opening up.

If you’re out shopping or getting a manicure, or have tossed your mask in the bin, I have some select words for you. But I’ll be nice instead. Please reconsider your choices, things might get much worse before they get better.

But come what may, we’re all coming up with different ways to stay entertained, stay sane.

1. Indulge in neighbor-watching. Yes, it sounds super voyeuristic, and frankly is just that. I somehow have been blessed with a flat where the view is every room of every house in the building in front of mine. I also for some weird reason can hear everything happening in the common areas of our building. I have one interesting story per day, whether I want it or not. Ranging from a blackmailing maid to a woman threatening our guards post midnight to the house where the TV is on 24×7. Who needs Netflix?
2. Turn into Masterchef Andheri West. Flip those potatoes even though you can just turn them over. Sprinkle salt with a flourish instead of just using the spoon. Call your Daal Sabzi a lentil reduction with stir fried potatoes in cumin and delicate spices. Arrange them neatly on your plate and add a splash of green chutney by spreading it in a line with the back of your spoon. Be your own Gordon.
3. Gamify your chores. 1 point for every time you wash utensils. 2 for jhadoo-pocha. A bonus 5 points for the person who cleans the hair stuck in the bathroom drain. We have no idea what to do with the tally of points. But one day, when we get out of this lockdown, one of us would have won, well, something.
4. Talk to your plants. I’ve heard this helps. It helps nurture the plants. It helps nurture your soul. Full disclaimer though – I have one plant. It’s almost dead. Not sure what that says about my soul.
5. Schedule a time to consume news. It’s a lot to digest. And mostly negative. Make sure you’re reading things when you know you can handle it. Because personally, I’m not sure if in the middle of a hard day, I can really handle Karthik Aryan’s tiktok video punishing his sister for making bad roti. Or deal with the trauma of trying to pronounce Elon Musk’s child’s name.
6. Switch off from social media. It’s just too much information. And too many people sharing recipes, workout videos, pictures of their abs, and travel pics. Do you really need more of that in your life? Oh, but then you’ll have all this free time. And FOMO. Oh, no, we can’t have that. Let’s look at those abs instead.